I have been very pleased with my parenting decisions so far but there are a handful of things that I would do differently next time, nothing major. This list is not comprehensive but it gives you an idea.
Would they get done? Maybe some….
What I would do differently
1- I would hire a post partum doula and/or accept cooking/cleaning help. The first few weeks were brutal, specially after hubby went back to work and I would spend the bulk of the day alone with baby while recovering from surgery. Nothing got cleaned, I barely ate and it was just a miserable time.
2- I would get a real high chair, booster seats are not the same.
3- I would make sure that my husband has a carrier that works for him, babywearing rocks and I want him to experience it too.
4- I would get professional professional newborn photos. We have hundreds of cute Shammy pictures but they’re all amateur shots.
5- I would not listen to the incorrect breastfeeding advice given by the nurses at the hospital, instead I would follow what I had already learned. This would have saved time, headaches and sleep and Shammy wouldn’t have lost as much weight at first.
6- I would give elimination communication a fair chance. I barely did it and got promising results almost instantly but laziness among other factors made me drop it.
7- I would research BLW more and try it. Making my own baby food was fun but messy and he didn’t like purees all that long.
8- I would not limit the number of baby costumes that I buy for the 1st Halloween. Gotta take advantage before I loose the ability to choose what to put on. There are way too many cute choices out there!
9- Join the playgroup circuit sooner. The only thing that has stopped me this time is not having a car.
10- I would not skimp out on newborn cloth diapers and get good tiny cloth diapers like Lil’s Joeys. I tried to go cheap with prefolds and covers and Shammy couldn’t stand it so we had to use sposies until he grew into his one size diapers, don’t want to have to do that again. With enough planning I can purchase them little by little and they have a good resale value so it would still cost less than sposies.
11- Take sign language beyond the basics, we did very good with it at first and once again laziness and life got in the way and I just stopped using it. Shame on me.
12- I would fight for my placenta. It was Shammy’s roommate for over 9 months, it kept him alive and they just toss it?! It’s standard procedure for the hospital to take the placenta away and I tried to fight for it while I was lying open on the operating table and was so overwhelmed with suddenly being a mother that I didn’t push the subject after I was in recovery. To this day I feel a sense of loss about it and wish that I could get it even though I couldn’t encapsulate it I would still do art with it.
Things that I would totally do all over again
1- Labor at home. I’m now high risk and wouldn’t quality for a homebirth in most cases but would like to still labor at home for as long as possible.
2- Have a doula. My husband was awesome but he’s just one guy and great for some things but clueless on other, a doula provides the perfect complement and balance.
3- Skip on Vitamin K shot and eye goop. No regrets about skipping it, it wasn’t hard for me to take the Vitamin K drops and passing it through the breastmilk.
4- Skip/delay vaccinations. I don’t regret this one bit, in fact I’m tempted to take things a step further and delay/space them out even more. Either way I’m definitely repeating the no shots until 6 months part.
5- No circumcision (if boy). If I need to explain this one you need a Prepuce Information Pack. Heck, I’ll lend you mine!
6- Breastfeed. I am so glad that I was determined enough to overcome the speed bumps and successfully breastfeed exclusively for 6 months and continue breastfeeding today (9 months and counting).
7- Co sleep. Our bed isn’t big enough for traditional cosleeping (although Shammy made it work by kicking his daddy out of the bed and sleeping with me, lol. I would buy a king size mattress and just put it on the floor. Easier than attaching the bassinet/crib to the bed. I’ve never come close to rolling over Shammy and in my sleep my mother’s 6th sense has been known to stretch out my arm and stop my husband from rolling over.
8- Babywear. Babywearing saved my sanity during the first few months by being the only thing that would calm a screaming Shammy and even though it’s not necessary anymore I still thoroughly enjoy it. I would like to get a better hang of ring slings though.
9- Cloth diaper. So cute, so economical, so environmental. I would love to have the wallet to be constantly trying new styles but have a good working stash with that I have.
10- I would again stay home as much as possible and not accept visitors outside of family for the first 2 weeks. I am glad that I instituted this rule and stuck by it.
11- I would still refuse to cry it out. I can’t understand how someone can let their child scream for hours. And for those that use the modified method of 5 minutes on, 5 minutes off, glad that it works for you but it’s still not for me. It’s still contrary to Attachment Parenting and 1 minute is too long.
12- Use consignment sales. The only new clothes that we bought were on clearance, the rest were gifts or purchased on consignment, same for all of the gear and most toys.