The Bump Chronicles- week 30

Let me say, I’m absolutely thrilled about this baby.  But when it comes to babies in general, I’m just NOT a “baby person.”

People see my bump and seem to automatically want me to hold their baby.  Listen, they’re all adorable babies, but I don’t know what to do with it!  I feel so put on the spot, like just because I am pregnant I am supposed to form a magical bond with this little guy and I’m just not built that way.  I think my biggest trigger for anxiety is having the poor baby start crying simply because I’m not it’s mommy, embarrassing.

I used to have that gift as a teen, kids just LOVED me, they would love to be with me, I would tolerate being with them, then I forgot all of the skills that I gained from baby sitting, lol. I thought maybe now that I AM pregnant I would get more pleasure out of holding random babies, but I was wrong.

I noticed that I’m not even good at the “baby talk and funny faces” interactions that people do with babies, maybe because I see babies as having a more developed (and currently learning) brain than that and I don’t want to insult their intelligence. Now give me a kitten and I’ll be the queen of baby talk and funny faces, lol.

Please tell me I’m not alone.  Am I the only one that doesn’t really like playing with random babies?? I do expect to get unlimited pleasure out of holding our baby, I look forward to wearing him/her often.

Speaking of baby wearing… I have figured out how to make own carrier and save $40, it’s simply a matter of going to Joann’s fabric and getting 5 yards of the fabric of choice. Years ago I gave up on trying to hem anything, sowing machines recoil in fear at my mere presence, and automatically jam at my touch; besides, overlock looks pretty cool in this case. Who owns a serger and knows how to use it?

The process looks so easy for someone that can cut and hem or serge fabric, if I can figure that last part of the process out I may then have to worry about going crazy and having too many different types of fabric, then you can BET that the baby will have at least one tie dye and at least 1 dragonfly wrap, lol.

On other news, it’s cool that Baby Fox is being more responsive to the outside world, I have discovered that he/she has a very strong opinion (don’t know if it’s positive or negative) about action scenes in movies, there was a LOT of kicking and movement while watching Iron Man 2 at the theater last weekend.

My tolerance to heat seems to be dropping at the same pace that the temperatures are increasing, freaking great. I don’t want to run the A/C all day, I used to only run it to sleep but lately I find myself having to turn it on for a few minutes here and there. I can’t drive during the day without using the A/C. Trying to just grin and bear the heat yields a tired, uncomfortable and cranky Bandora, not a good combo. I also end up losing my appetite, not a good thing when lately I seem to be having trouble eating enough. I will just have to brace myself for a higher than average electric bill over the next few months.

Daddy Fox got to put his ear against the bump and hear baby’s heartbeat! Combine that with the belly kisses he gives and my heart just melts every time. Can I get an “aaaawwww”?

While at a local consignment store the clerk was enthusiastically talking to me about her cloth diapering experience when I noticed her have a slip of the tongue and described formula-fed, disposable-diaper clad babies as “regular”. She caught herself and self corrected but it immediately pointed out to me how it seems that society at large seems to consider formula and disposables as normal while cloth diapers and breastfeeding are considered “fringe” and a rarity.

We’ve gotten a good start to our cloth diaper supply, I currently have 1 dozen newborn size prefold diapers and a couple of covers to go with them. I will probably get another dozen or so to avoid having to do laundry on a daily basis since we still don’t have a washer at our house. I also got 15 used Bumgenius one-size diapers to be used as baby Fox outgrows the newborn size diapers.

I will continue to keep my eyes open for used cloth diapers to expand inventory and have a wider variety and flexibility. Trying to stay away from Etsy where there are way too many cute options for handmade diapers and covers, I did break down and order 1 baby ninja and 1 tie dye cover but will try to aim for more used.

It sucks that I’m just not crafty when it comes to sewing, I have come across several patterns online along with cute prints and fabrics at the store.

What is it with the spike in crib recalls lately? it makes me not want to bother looking at cribs, it seems like it’s only a matter of time before it gets recalled. And then people complain about co-sleeping.

Now that I am 10 weeks away I’m thinking more about life post bump. I do continue to plan on blogging but the blog name will obviously have to change, I am open to suggestions on what to call it!

I do stop and thing about the first few days of official mommy hood and a concern that immediately comes to mind is how to handle the visitor situation. Just because I may feel like a hermit doesn’t mean that I should deprive the world of the awesomeness that is baby Fox but at the same time I don’t expect to be in the mood for visitors for the first 5 days or so but since people will want to visit the baby and not me I’m willing to work out a compromise.  I already talked this out with hubby, no non-family visitors for the first 2 weeks and no unannounced visitors on any day.

I’m truly hoping that people will be busy ogling over the baby that I’ll just get a hi, congratulations and bye.  I do not want to deal with the “how are you feeling?”, “how is the baby sleeping?”, “how is breastfeeding”, “was labor hard?” and any other variation of questions, also do not expect to be in the mood to recount the birth story unless it’s on my terms and whenever I feel like it, that’s why I blog.

Perhaps I should have a waiver prepared for people to sign before they can make it through the door.

“By visiting during the early post-partum period I agree to focus most of my attention on baby and daddy and although I will acknowledge mom’s existence I will not burden her with questions and limit my verbal interactions with her to normal, everyday conversation unless she takes the initiative to change the subject.

If I fail to do so I agree to relinquish my visiting rights effective immediately and will have to see baby via Facebook photos until the post-partum period is over.”

I really don’t want it to come to that but I know what I’m like when I’m not hormonal so I can not imagine how the first postpartum days will be like. Visitors beware!

I am also starting to think about is daycare options. I haven’t done any visits to any places yet, just internet research and talking to a couple of people for referrals. So far it’s discouraging having to deal with sticker shock at the huge cost that will take up a big chunk out of my paycheck and trying to find a place that is safe, clean, nurturing and open minded to cloth diapers. The more I look, the more repulsed that I become by actual centers, I may need to be looking into home based daycare soon.

That’s the disadvantage of having family living an ocean away, I can’t just do what my mom did with me and pay have work from home aunt to take care of me when I was little.

No new belly pictures yet, hoping to fix that this weekend.

I do apologize if this blog entry seems more erratic and disjointed than usual, I am tired and my thinking is just as fragmented…